“You will not believe this!” I slap my hands on the table, and on the opposite side, Tinsley, her shoulder-length blond hair pulled into a high ponytail, looks up with wide eyes, mouth agape. “I got the notification from Archer Collins. Archer freaking Collins, Tins, can you believe it?”

Tinsley rolls her green eyes and pops her gum. “Of course I believe it, Edie. I was sitting next to you when you filled out the application. It’s hardly news that an Ivy League college will respond to their prospective students.”

I collapse onto the chair. “Don’t ruin this for me, Tinsley. It’s a big deal.”

“Yes, but screaming in the library goes against everything you believe in, Edie.”

I bite my lip and glance around; several people glare back. “Sorry.”

Tinsley leans across the table. “Have you read it?”

I hold back my laughter. “Of course. I was refreshing my screen every two seconds until the page updated.”

She snickers. “What’s the verdict then?”

Excitement bubbles under the surface, and I barely manage to contain myself. “I got in. This is the best science school on the East Coast, and I got in!”

Tinsley grins.

“I mean, of course, I got in. I’m top of our class, Senior Class President, I’ve been a finalist in the last three regional STEM fairs, I have a 4.12 GPA, a 32 on my ACT, a 1510 on my SATs, and my IQ is 137.”

“Plus all the hours you spent organizing our school’s disaster relief after Hurricane Vito…as a freshman,” Tinsley adds.

“Is that impressive?” I can’t hide my grin. “I did everything I could to get accepted short of convincing Mama to send me to prep school—”

“Speaking of your mother—” She levels me with a serious gaze. “Have you told her about this?”

All excitement dissipates. “Not yet. I don’t…I don’t know where to begin. Do you know what the first thing she’ll say is?”

Tinsley tilts her head from side to side, lips quirked to the side. “‘Archer Collins is an expensive place to find a husband’?” A devious smile tugs at her lavender-painted lips.

I roll my eyes.

“You applied without telling her you want to go there, Edie.” Tinsley blows another bubble, and the pop is loud. “Your mom expects you to go to a small private school and drop out when you find a serious boyfriend. She’s going to flip when you tell her about Archer Collins.”

My stomach drops.

While Tinsley has a particularly snarky way with words, she’s not wrong. Mama encourages me to do well, but she never cared about my academic achievements—grades and intelligence aren’t important to her. Which is her prerogative.

I just wish she realized how much they matter to me.

“I’ll figure that out when I get there,” I finally say. “Besides, she can’t complain about the money—look at this!” I unlock my phone and shove it into Tinsley’s hands.

“‘The Trustee Scholarship,'” she reads.

“Exactly!” I scoot in my chair. I can’t hold still. “It’s this amazing opportunity. I qualify to apply for it because of my ACT and SAT scores. I could win up to thirty thousand dollars in annual scholarship money. That’s incredible!”

Her eyes flit across the screen, lavender lips pursed. “How do you apply?”

“There’s a weekend sometime in February where I go to this banquet to chat with current students and alumni. I stay in the dorms with a sponsor student for Friday and Saturday night, and on Saturday, I have a forty-five-minute interview with a couple faculty members.”

Tinsley raises an eyebrow. “So you have to tell your mom before February.”

I wince.

Yes. I have a deadline now.

“What if she says you can’t go?”

“I don’t know.” My voice quivers—it’s a serious concern. If I can’t make it to the Trustee Weekend, I can’t get the scholarship. “I’ll figure it out.”

Tinsley nods and holds her tongue. She knows as well as I do how difficult that conversation will be.

Mama won’t want me to go, and I have yet to figure out how to convince her. I’m not sure I can. In the past, Papa would vouch for me, but he’s unable to now.

Tinsley taps her acrylic nails, a fluorescent plum to match her lipstick, on the tabletop. “Speaking of permission, have you asked about New Year’s Eve?”

I close my eyes. “I can’t go.”

“Because it’s a boy-girl sleepover?” She scoffs. “You’re such a goody-two-shoes. You didn’t have to tell her that, Edie.”

To be fair, Mama would flip about boys at a sleepover, but she’d say no long before I got to that part of the explanation.

“We’re going to the Bartons’ party that night, Tinsley. She won’t let me out of it since I missed the memorial.” I lean back, trying to relax, but I’m as irritated as Tinsley. The last thing I want to do is waste an entire night at a social event I couldn’t care less about.

“They’re still having their party?”

“Every year.”

She shakes her head. “It hasn’t been that long since, you know, Mrs. Barton died.”

“Doctor,” I correct. “She was a doctor. Why does everyone forget that just because she was married?”

Tinsley rolls her eyes. “Either way, it seems awfully early to have a huge celebration when she only died like six weeks ago.”

I inhale sharply.

Everyone remembers the date. The whole world watched on October 30th as the Space Shuttle Endurance tore apart upon reentry. Not long before the shuttle broke atmo, an oxygen tank in the service module exploded. Metal shards damaged the heat shield, igniting the pressurized gas and destabilizing the capsule to the point it tumbled and ripped apart.

It’s been almost seven weeks, and they’re still picking up debris and body parts spread across Texas. It was heartbreaking, especially since Dr. Barton was a renowned citizen of little Tourmaline, an expert in her field, an idol for young female scientists like myself.

“I wasn’t expecting it either, but Mama insisted we pay our respects.”

“You mean you and Noah might actually be nice to each other?” Tinsley’s mouth gapes open mockingly. “Is that possible?”

My lips twist into a sneer. “I’ll be nice if he is.”

“He missed all his classes. He didn’t complete his finals. Is he going to be at the party? Hell, is he going to complete his senior year?”

I hadn’t considered that.

Despite the melancholy situation, I can’t imagine Noah Barton not graduating on time. We fought for top of our class since we were kids. He’s been my rival at the New England STEM Fair in Portland for the last seven years. We’ve both gotten into the final round since freshman year, but he’s placed higher than me two out of three times.

It’s been strange without him in class, and I can’t imagine competing in the STEM fair without him there too. We get under each other’s skin, but the competition keeps me vigilant.

“Of course he’ll graduate with us. Noah couldn’t live with himself if he didn’t graduate on time. You know he already applied to colleges. Deferring would be admitting defeat.”

Tinsley swallows, and her lavender lips settle in a straight line. “Deferring because your mother died isn’t admitting defeat, Edie. You shouldn’t be so…insensitive about other people’s feelings.”

I freeze.

It’s rare I don’t know what to say. I always have an answer for everything, a solution to every problem. Even if I’m flying by the seat of my pants.

People have called me bullheaded, bossy, aggressive, but Tinsley always accepts me for who I am. She insists I shouldn’t let others’ harsh words bring me down. Even when she criticizes me, she’s friendly and encouraging.

Technically, calling me “insensitive” is one of the nicest ways to say I’m being rude. Careless. Heartless.

My eyes drift around the library.

We come here often—not because Tinsley finds it interesting but because it’s one of the few places my mother approves of. Even if Mama doesn’t care about academics, she’d rather I focus on those than get into trouble. The library is my sanctuary. It’s one of our regular hang-out spots, but it’s also where I come to reflect and be alone.

I wish I were alone now.

“I’m sorry, Edie.” Her voice is quiet, but in the silence, it’s loud enough. “I didn’t mean—”

“You did.” I heave a sigh. “Sometimes, I forget not everyone reacts the way I do. Maybe even Noah Barton needs more time to grieve. I don’t know.”

Tinsley offers me a sad smile, but it holds no comfort.

“I guess I’ll have to be nice if he’s there.” I shrug, trying to adopt a relaxed tone. “First time for everything, right?”